You can always count on TikTok to reveal new mental health trends. The newest one, called “rejection therapy,” encourages those who suffer from social anxiety to seek out rejection so they can become desensitized to it, ultimately improving their apprehension when it comes to social situations. The technique is essentially another form of exposure therapy.
With 63 million views on TikTok, many users are participating in the trend, but therapists question whether it’s helpful. According to Jenniel Taylor, a registered psychotherapist at Bloom, Psychology & Wellness, rejection therapy is rooted in exposure therapy and emotional tolerance training, both pillars of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), which combines elements of psychological principles with a gamification approach.
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Although it may be a good method of therapy, Taylor believes the trend isn’t without its risks. “Individuals with underlying mental health conditions, like depression and general anxiety, may find their symptoms exacerbated by constant exposure to rejection. Additionally, repeated failures can erode self-esteem and lead to emotional distress. It’s essential to approach rejection therapy with caution and mindfulness,” she states.
If you’re considering trying this method, Taylor suggests carefully weighing your emotional wellness and the potential risks and benefits, as well as seeking professional guidance. A therapist can provide tailored support and strategies to mitigate possible risks or help you deal with emotional dysregulation. It is also advisable to start with low-stakes challenges, gradually increase intensity, and always prioritize self-care.
It’s important to remember that rejection therapy is one piece of the puzzle and shouldn’t be a comprehensive solution for social anxiety. “Professional therapy can offer a deeper understanding of attachment wounds that may be informing how you handle rejection, and it can give insights into the root causes of your social anxiety while providing additional tools to challenge negative beliefs, develop coping mechanisms, and build resilience,” Taylor says.
A strong support network is also beneficial for anyone embarking on this journey. Friends, family, or support groups can offer encouragement, empathy, and a safe space to process your challenges and recover if you have a terrible experience.
Rejection is a normal part of life. Building resilience takes time, and finding healthy ways to cope and grow as you do is essential, especially offline. Taylor believes that rejection therapy can be a component of overcoming social anxiety when approached with caution and professional guidance. A holistic approach includes therapy, self-care, and a strong support network.
Alternatively, Natasha Reynolds, a therapist at Bloom Psychology & Wellness, believes that rejection therapy allows you to take low emotional risks and build confidence and momentum to try new things, which can lead to more opportunities and stepping outside of one’s comfort zone. But that doesn’t mean it’s an automatic cure for social anxiety. “There can be varying degrees of social anxiety one might experience that can result in this ‘rejection therapy’ being a hindrance rather than supportive for social anxiety, especially if someone is experiencing social anxiety more severely. For example, someone who excessively ruminates after exposures and experiences panic attacks during or after exposure,” Reynolds states.
Reflection is key if you’d like to participate in this trend. Reynolds encourages people to reflect on whether this exposure is aligned with their values. For example, ask yourself, am I going towards what I want or what matters to me or away from it? Am I upholding my boundaries and respecting others’ boundaries in this process? Am I aware of my limits in practicing this trend? What would tell me that I need further support on my journey to navigating social anxiety?
Although exposing yourself to situations that trigger, increase, amplify, and exacerbate your worst anxiety fears is not in and of itself a bad thing, Reynolds also believes you should practice this approach with a licensed professional and not on your own. Therapists customize treatment plans and support their clients to deal with their anxiety in gradual and highly tailored ways, being mindful of unnecessarily triggering people with the hopes of preventing the risk of the person who needs treatment becoming re-traumatized and making anxiety worse than when it started. “This makes the TikTok trend of rejection therapy potentially very dangerous when done without guidance or supervision and extremely risky for people who may not know the depth of their anxiety and how rejection therapy may impact them in unhelpful ways,” adds psychotherapist and founder of Bloom Psychology & Wellness, Meghan Watson.
She continues, “Imagine if your social anxiety created intense, recurring panic attacks, and you saw a TikTok trend around rejection therapy, trying it without careful support, planning, and discussions with a mental health professional. If you were triggered into a trauma or anxiety response without plan or preparation or appropriate post-intervention processing, the risk of re-traumatization, negative core belief development, and reactive interpersonal stress is very high.”
